Washington Whispers
Out of the Fire and Into the Frying Pan
Turns out that the Gang of Three who've held the top job in the Pentagon communications office since President Bush took office have more in common than explaining the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and, at least until last week's surprise flameout, defending Donald Rumsfeld. They cook. Or more specifically, they are Thanksgiving turkey fryers. "It's fun," says Bush's first Pentagon spokeswoman, Torie Clarke. "There must be something about the office," joshes fryer newcomer Dorrance Smith, who succeeded weekend outdoor chef Lawrence Di Rita. Smith tells us he just purchased a deep fryer, picking one from the national Barbeques Galore chain, then E-mailing Di Rita and Clarke for helpful tips on getting started.
Clarke, a self-described "fryer queen," had lots of them, including (1) Wear goggles. "That stuff could splatter; it could blind you." (2) Fry two smaller birds: It's fast and easier to serve. (3) Demand peanut oil—it cooks better. "Don't go look at the price of peanut oil," Clarke E-mails Smith, "and have a heart attack, and go with something else." And don't coat the bird with seasoning, she says. Smith's done a dry run with a chicken, and all went well, or certainly better than a recent fry at the Clarke home. "One time, we forgot we put the second turkey in," she confesses. On finding it the next day, "it looked like one of those petrified fossils. It looked like it was 10,000 years old."
A Speaker and Her Smack-Down Roots
Outgoing House Speaker Dennis Hastert, the former high school wrestling coach, isn't the only fan of the sport in the House. We hear that incoming House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is a buff, though of the more flamboyant TV wrestling. In wooing the youthful World Wrestling Entertainment crowd, she declared herself right before the election to be a huge fan of the first smack-down great, Gorgeous George. See, she was a girl when George Wagner brought showmanship to the sport. And his flair, which was said to influence Liberace and Muhammad Ali, made her a TV fan forever.
Political Ads: From Bad to Worse
Sorry if you hated all those candidate calls at dinnertime during the last two weeks of the midterm elections, but it's only going to get worse in 2008. Both parties plan to invade your computer with instant messages and pop-up ads, and your cellphone and BlackBerry will get zapped with text advertisements. But there is good news. They plan to cut back on TV advertising because it just isn't as effective as the Internet.
The Chairman's Weatherman Trick
One of the big surprises for the Democrats in the elections was winning up to 33 percent of the white Christian evangelical vote. And here's how they did it: Democratic Party Chairman Howard Dean says he simply bought every advertising minute available on Christian radio, effectively blocking out the GOP. Ads touted Democratic values. The real secret: "We had the weatherman doing the ads. Why? Because he's a local person who could be trusted."
Unveiled: Portrait of an Officer
Surveys show Americans think the military is tops when it comes to leadership. But inside the Pentagon, the brass think they could do better at training and picking the next generation of leaders. To help, human resources firm CPP Inc. was hired three years ago to help one branch develop a better blueprint to pick the best and the brightest. This week the firm releases its 18-point "portrait of a leader," which will aid in picking the next brass. Key leadership traits: self-control, self-confidence, influence, understanding others, capacity for collaboration, and creativity.
Now on the Web, Oval Office Hopes
He's the popular New Mexico governor who has done stints in Congress, the United Nations, and the Energy Department, so it's about time Bill Richardson had a website promoting him for president. Well, americaforrichardson.org is up and running, and its webmaster, former Richardson aide Jeff Gulko, says the goal is to get 2008's lone Hispanic hopeful elected president. It might be working. Democrat Richardson tells us he's mulling over a January announcement and says, "I've got something to offer."
Which Is Worse, a Beating or a Bris?
Even in the middle of last week's GOP election wreckage, party boss Ken Mehlman had time for humor. Reviewing Virginia Sen. George Allen's disastrous and losing re-election bid, Mehlman, a Jew, mentioned how Allen discovered his Jewish roots during the campaign. Mehlman says he called Allen to welcome him to the "tribe," then asked: "Do you know what a bris is?" referring to the circumcision ceremony. "He said he kind of knew," says Mehlman, "and I can tell you he wasn't into it."
Rushing Into a Night of Insults
Look out, Michael J. Fox and any other liberals. Conservative yakker Rush Limbaugh is taking his one-man show to Washington this week. At the Thursday show, sponsored by WMAL and the Heritage Foundation for the benefit of the Fisher House Foundation, we hear he'll most likely touch on Fox, incoming Democratic Speaker Nancy Pelosi, the GOP's impotence, and his use of Viagra.
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?
Politicians usually don't do love scenes without controversy, and former senator and Pentagon boss William Cohen thought that was the case with his relationship and eventual marriage to Janet Langhart, a former Black Entertainment Television host. In the touching Love in Black and White, due out Valentine's Day, Cohen tells of falling for Langhart over Absolut Vodka and getting the jitters over telling his parents and sons his girlfriend was African-American. Turns out it wasn't a problem. His parents took to her fast. And his eldest son beat Cohen with his own news about dating a black woman. "Maybe we should have a double wedding," his son offered.
With Silla Brush
This story appears in the November 20, 2006 print edition of U.S. News & World Report.