About Those Side Pockets on a Cow
Rep. John Dingell isn't just the third-longest-serving House member ever, passing the 50-year mark last week at a Hill lunch to celebrate his 1955 election to replace his father. He's also one of the few who can break up the dreadful bureaucracy-speak with folksy sayings like "That's about as useful as side pockets on a cow" and "Madder than a boiled owl." Dingell, 79, tells our congressional correspondent Danielle Knight that the use of "Dingellisms" goes back to his father. "I learned a lot from my dad," he says. "Dad was a very colorful fella."
Let's be clear: Dingellisms are not like "Dingellgrams," the famously harsh, sometimes belligerent notes to agencies the congressman is angry with. Instead, Dingellisms are quirky, off-the-cuff comments that are rich with meaning. Take the one that sizes up bipartisanship: "My pappy used to say," explains Dingell, that "when they say they want to be bipartisan, it means they don't have the votes." Ex-aide Dennis Fitzgibbons says Dingell trolls histories for some of his phrases. "A lot of them come from his reading," says Fitzgibbons. And some, he adds, come from Dingell's favorite Gilbert and Sullivan plays. Others Dingell just blurts out. Our faves: "There is no substitute for a public hanging" and "He's so crooked, they will have to screw him into the ground," a comment Dingell made after one such politician had just died.
Iraq Searches, American Style
American-style search warrants are coming to Iraq, a victory for locals who don't like random searches but a defeat for some troops who think surprise searches are useful. While still under review, the new policy requiring search warrants is expected to go into force next month. "That is fine," Lt. Col. Alan Kelly tells our Julian E. Barnes in Mosul. Kelly, commander of the 172nd Stryker Brigade's 1-17 infantry battalion, explains that most bad guys operate from roving cars, not houses, anyway. But other officers aren't happy, believing the new policy will lead insurgents to simply shift strategies. "It will be just like the mosques," one tells Barnes. "They will start hiding weapons in their homes."
Saving CBS in C-SPAN Style
Washington's keeping an eye on CBS's search for a new nightly news anchor and is eager for Black Rock to look beyond the obvious candidates like NBC's Today cohost Katie Couric. Such as? C-SPAN founder Brian Lamb. "I think that would be super," says a Bush insider. Lamb's not so sure. "Some folks," he E-mails, "have been drinkin' the spiked eggnog again."
Friendship Won't Stop Hagel Bid
He's Sen. John McCain 's best pal in the Senate, a fellow Vietnam War vet, but that won't stop Nebraska Sen. Chuck Hagel from running for president in 2008 against the current front-runner. "You know that there will be a lot of very good people in the race," says Hagel, who won't decide until late next year. "You know some of them are going to be your close friends." He adds: "I could not, or would I, base my decision on John McCain running or not running."
Where Are the Presidential Beans?
January marks five years since Bill Clinton left office, and the anniversary is the first opportunity for sensitive documents to be FOIA'd from his presidential library. For an indication of what researchers and regular folks might want, we went to the Bush library to see what's popular among the former president's documents. Robert Holzweiss, the supervisory archivist at the George H. W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum, says a top pick is former Vice President Dan Quayle 's famous Murphy Brown speech. "People remember it," he says. Another hit is Bush's Christmas 1990 letter to his kids--including W.--on the eve of the Gulf War. It's so popular that the original was put on display. Then there are some weird requests. "Some people want [to see] every thing they ever sent to the president," says Holzweiss. "They want us to produce the letter they wrote when they sent that can of Bush beans to the president."
Another Way Onions Bring Tears
A crackdown on the exploding Afghan drug trade--the world's largest--has smugglers trying new tricks. They're now using the Internet and satellite phones, while hiding their dope in ever more ingenious ways, say drug agents. One shipment of hash this year was hidden in 200 vacuum-packed spaghetti sauce bags. Another stash was rolled into balls and disguised as onions, with the skin wrapped around.
Santa Delivers Year Round to Iraq
Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa, even for troops overseas. And the best part: He works year round. We're talking about AnySoldier.com, the Internet site that hooks up troops who need stuff like toiletries and games with donors ready to help. Founder Marty Horn says just go to his site, click a name, see what's needed, then send a care package. Include letters. "There are a lot of guys who don't receive a lot of mail and it is important to know there are people out there on the other side who care," Staff Sgt. Edward Coleman of San Antonio says from Mosul. Horn adds: "Christmas is a big time to send, but don't forget the rest of the year."
The Veep Still Loves His Scooter
Want proof that loyalty and friendship mean more than politics in the Bush administration? Then go no further than Vice President Dick Cheney 's Christmas party last week, where ex-aide Lewis "Scooter" Libby, ousted after his indictment in the CIA spy-outing case, was given a hero's welcome. "He was warmly received, and he looked terrific," says a partygoer. "Everyone was happy to see him." Libby arrived with his wife and sans attorney and went through the photo line just like everybody else. And while he shunned talk about his case, "everyone wished him well," says our tipster.
With David E. Kaplan
This story appears in the December 26, 2005 print edition of U.S. News & World Report.