Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien both were on the air with new material last night, and the targets of their political humor included Bill Clinton, the controversy over President Bush's National Guard service, and John Kerry's campaign.
Jay Leno:
"Let's start off with the political news. Of course, the bickering, the name-calling, the endless lying back and forth. Great having Bill and Hillary back in the news again, huh?"
Jay Leno:
"President Bush spoke to the members of the National Guard at the convention in Las Vegas today. Boy, a lot of those guys are really excited to see him. Well, sure. You know, a lot of them, they've been waiting since the early '70s to see him."
Jay Leno:
"Let's see what's going on over at C-BS news."
Jay Leno:
"New documents surfaced today proving that President Bush did not fulfill his National Guard service. CBS says they know they're new, 'cause they were just printed over the weekend."
Jay Leno:
"It's nothing but disasters on the news. Hurricane Frances, Hurricane Ivan, the Kerry campaign. It's just one disaster after another."
Jay Leno:
"Crime in the US is at a 30-year low. Lowest it's ever been since '72. And today, John Kerry blamed the whole thing on President Bush. He said the economy is so bad, even criminals are having a hard time finding jobs."
Jay Leno:
"The number one film in the country is 'Resident Evil: The Apocalypse.' I believe this is Michael Moore's second film on President Bush."
Conan O'Brien:
"President Bush said, 'It is critical,' – this is a quote – 'It is critical that the president of the United States speak clearly and consistently.' Yeah, immediately afterwards, Bush resigned the presidency."
