JOHN LEO'S BLOG

America is clearly running out of euphemisms for Christmas, or C––-mas, as it is popularly known. Aren't we all tired of "winterval," "the holidays," "winter break," and "the season" (as in "season's greetings")? Australia contributed "end-of-year celebration," possibly because "winter break" seems somehow inappropriate for a day that occurs in the Aussie summer. A college professor once wished my eldest daughter a happy Christmahannukwanzakah. That's catchy, but it still has the banned C-word, or eight ninths of it, right there upfront, causing the gnashing of many teeth. What to do? So far, the all-time-champion entry in the Christmas-averting sweepstakes is "Sparkle Days." The city administration of Pittsburgh coined the term several years ago and used it until the hoots of laughter got too loud and the city had to be de-sparkled.

So this blog is announcing a C––-mas euphemism contest. No Hallmarky clunkers like "the joyous time of year." No attempts to sneak in Festivus, the day invented by George Costanza's father (Jerry Stiller) on Seinfeld and celebrated by raising a bare aluminum pole in one's living room. The winner will receive some sort of prize, maybe a photo of a multicultural tree, a postcard from Canada (where C-Day disappeared some time in 1957), or a taped interview with the inventor of "Sparkle Days," now retired. Send entries to jleo@usnews.com. The winner will be announced on Sparkle Eve.