Glenn Beck's Egypt Protest Theories Show He's Finally Lost It

The conservative pundit knows just enough history to be dangerous rather than simply ignorant.

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Let me see if I have this straight.

According to Glenn Beck, the Egyptian crisis is part of a “coming insurrection” that spans the Mediterranean region of Africa and Southern Europe, and could at some point involve Russia and China. The culprits are an unholy alliance of Weather Underground-type Marxists and radical Islamists (both Shia and Sunni). [See photos of the Egypt protests.]

Step one is to destroy Western civilization. Step two is to establish a new caliphate—an Islamic theocracy. The ’60s radicals Bill Ayers and Bernadine Dorhn are, in this schema, willing to live with the latter so long as step one is accomplished.

[Take the U.S. News poll: How well is the Obama administration handling the Egypt crisis?]

Fittingly, Beck, obsessed as he is with Woodrow Wilson and those nefarious Progressives, sees Egypt through the prism of World War I. (I’ll give him points for this, as most lazy pundits are limited to World War II analogies.)

For Beck, the unrest in Tunisia, which preceded that in Egypt, was akin to the war-sparking assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. (The “Archduke Ferdinand moment” is apparently a recurring Beck tic.) The agitation for reform in the Arab world is vaguely connected to anti-austerity protests in debt-riddled European countries. [Check out a roundup of political cartoons on the Egypt protests.]

Of course it’s all connected. The media won’t tell you the truth. Only Glenn Beck will.

The man has finally blown a gasket. His pattern-recognition machine is spewing smoke and shards of metal.

In Beck’s bizarro world, the Ayatollah Khomeini and Abbie Hoffman are like the Ponch and John of anti-Americanism. All that rolling around naked in the mud at Woodstock was really a harbinger of Western women one day being forced to wear burqas. The Fugs have reunited, and they’re learning to chant the muezzin. [See political cartoons on the Tea Party.]

Beck is a college sophomore with a big budget. He knows just enough history to be dangerous rather than simply ignorant. His self-important lament about having made enemies on the left and right is a textbook martyr complex.

Alas, this nonsense is only going to get more nonsensical. Beck, whose ratings on both TV and radio are falling, is going to keep chasing after the high he enjoyed at his grandiose rally on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. 

But sane people will stop paying attention.

They may already have.

To wit: The Dow Jones just hit a post-recession high.

  • Take the U.S. News poll: Is the Obama administration handling the Egypt crisis well?
  • See a roundup of political cartoons on the Egypt protests.
  • Follow the money in Congress.