Scientists believe that dinosaurs roamed the earth until their extinction 65 million years ago. The religious right believes dinosaurs were with us until six thousand years ago. They're both wrong. Anybody who watched the Conservative Political Action Committee conference last weekend or the Republican Party for the last few years knows the giant reptiles are still with us.
On Monday, the Republican National Committee released its own research on voter attitudes towards the GOP. The RNC study reports than Americans see the party as "narrow minded" and full of "stuffy old men." These are the RNC's words, not mine.
The RNC report also states that the party has to find better ways of getting its message across to the public. This will be much easier to do than changing Republican policies that the public finds so disturbing: things like killing Medicare, opposition to attempts to curb violence against women, and protecting federal tax freebies for big oil.
Here are my ideas for promoting the Republican brand.
The Major League baseball season starts on April 1 and I've come up with a great promotional tie between MLB and the GOP. The Republican Party can sponsor "Turn Back the Clock" nights with each of the major league teams to demonstrate the party's commitment to the past. Wouldn't it be great to see Paul Ryan, John Boehner and Mitch McConnell wearing the throw back rainbow uniforms of the 1970's Houston Astros or the brown and yellow uniforms made unpopular by the San Diego Padres?
A new brand needs a new slogan and I've come up with some ideas. Since the GOP is hell-bent on driving away the voters they need to win, I thought I'd help them along. It's the least I can do to put the party out of its misery. This is what I came up with.
Vote GOP to Turn Back the Clock: Republicans do fine with seniors, but the party is woefully inept with the fast growing population of millennials, voters born since 1982. A good example of the GOP's problems is the growing support for gay marriage. ABC News and The Washington Post released a new national survey Monday showing that support for gay marriage is at a record high (58 percent favor-36 percent oppose). Ten years ago, a large majority of Americans opposed gay marriage. An overwhelming number of millennials support gay marriage and support for the idea will grow as these young people become a larger proportion of the electorate. [Read the U.S. News Debate: Is the GOP's Problem in its Strategies or its Policies?]
Only Real Men Vote Republican: The GOP research report indicates that voters feel that the Republican Party is full of "stuffy old men." If the GOP doesn't change, the only people who'll vote for the party will be stuffy old men. Maybe that's why it is known as the GOP for Grand Old Party. Former First Lady Laura Bush told an audience that the Republican Party "frightens" many women. Republicans love to talk about rape and a majority of the Republicans in the U.S. House of Representatives voted recently against the Violence against Women Act.
If you have any ideas to rebrand the GOP, feel free to comment here and send them to RNC chair Reince Priebus. The new RNC autopsy states that Republicans were far behind Democrats technologically. John McCain, the 2008 GOP presidential nominee, didn't use email and Mitt Romney's campaign manager, Stuart Spencer, refused to use Twitter. I don't know if the GOP has email or Twitter yet. So you might want to send your ideas to the RNC via snail mail at 310 1st St. SE, Washington, DC 2003.