Caring for Grandchildren in Retirement

New life or sour grapes?

We decided to move to the Boulder area in order to be 'family' to our only son, his precious wife, and our newborn granddaughter last year. I am employed part-time and my husband had a well-paying job when we moved here. He has since been laid off. We came here fully aware that we wanted our transition to an active 'retirement' (hate that word!!) to include the joys of bonding with family. I think a lot depends on what your expectations are. We talked and prayed a lot about ways to achieve a good balance between involvement in a church and community as a couple, so that we would not build our life around our children and grandchildren. As a result, we feel that we have a full life and we are delighted to take care of our 15-month-old granddaughter several times a week. We carefully planned to reduce our living expenses and curtail travel to local hikes and free events in order to 'major' in community life and family life. We don't feel poorer, quite the contrary, we feel infinitely richer. The opportunity to experience those magical first words and first steps along with our kids is like a new lease on life. I would encourage any folks who feel 'trapped' or disappointed with their lives as assistant caregivers to look around and find ways to renew and reframe their circumstances and activities so that the gratitude and joy of their lives with family can shine through.

Miriam Champness of CO @ Jun 11, 2009 10:05:12 AM

retirement

I would rather watch my grandaughter play with one of her toys than go to Paris.

alan smart of TX @ Jun 11, 2009 08:20:24 AM

i look after my grandchildreni

its a pleasure to be able to have them stay even overnight when my son does dj ing. in south africa it is quite popular , especially single parents who find child carers are on the expensive side.

llewellyn.venter of SC @ Jun 11, 2009 01:47:19 AM

grandparents

you know.. i love what all of you have said. I am a grandchild whose mother died young and father left and was raised by my grandparents! That is another thing that you really do not hear very often. But I think it's great for grandparents to spend time with their grandchildren.. my great-grandparents were so much fun...i always looked forward to seeing them! I love my grandparents so much I call them Mom and Dad. IU could not have been more blessed!~

jennifer smith of CA @ Jun 09, 2009 21:15:59 PM

Sad State or One of the Most Enriching Experiences of a Llifetime?

I would say -- and I suspect most would agree -- with the latter. Grandparenting is one of the most enriching experiences of a lifetime. And getting to spend a couple of days taking care of the kids is icing on the cake! I commend this reporter for understanding the importance of nurturing the special bond between her children and their grandparents. It is one of the most valuable human relationships a person can have. It allows a child to discover so much about themselves and their own parents because grandparents are the keepers of all family lore and history. My grown boys still talk about the time Grandma and Grandpa watched them while I was on a business trip and my father dished out all the naughty things I did as a child! I hope I get to do that one day with my grandchildren!

Lori Roth of NY @ Jun 09, 2009 18:17:28 PM

grandparents caring for grandchildren in retirement

I love babysitting for my grandchildren. I have looked after them one day a week since they were born. I also babysit on the weekend when asked. I wish they lived next door, I could see them ever day. Since my husband retired he volunteers st their school. We still go out with our friends and travel, when we are gone the grandkids go to day care. It really is a win-win situation, we get to see our grandkids and they get to see us!

Mimi of WI @ Jun 09, 2009 16:04:19 PM

caring for grandchildren

Myrna....I happily agree with you!

kathleen of NJ @ Jun 09, 2009 15:51:15 PM

Caring for grandchildren in Retirement

It's a sad state when a writer needs her husbands retired parents to watch her children for four days. I'm surprised you don't ship the toddlers off to them when you're sequestered in your basement with your typewriter. Did you ever think that the grandparents didn't have the heart to say "no I'm just too tired". If your husband is around ask him to watch his own kids or just don't go. Let granny and gramps enjoy their day without having to pick up after your kids. They did their time.

Steve of NY @ Jun 09, 2009 15:29:27 PM