Obviously, the manager's favoritism IS affecting office morale. The situation described above sounds as if it's been going on for a long time. What happened to perception is reality in the office environment? What happened to management leading by example?
Alison's comments strict a nerve with me. In our workplace previously, the chairman of the company hired a private consulting firm to determine and address the problematic issues in the workplace.
At the end of the day, the consultant broke her confidentiality agreement and gave management the names and comments what everyone said when they were interviewed. People lost their jobs, others were shuffled. However, those who comicommitted atrocities in the workplace ie. management stayed put and received bonuses or promotions.
Sam
of WA
@
Nov 14, 2009 21:43:27 PM
Do not worry Lolo
Do not worry Lolo. Rumors can destroy a character for a short moment, but it would not stay long. Just be strong and be fair to others.
Jianing
@
Sep 09, 2009 05:29:13 AM
Rush to Judgement
Alison gives incredibly sound advice here, really every point but - "Aside from being annoying, is this affecting your work? If not, you should stay out of it because it's really not your business." What comes around, goes around, it really does.
I have an iron-clad work ethic. I have always had a great rapport with both men and women bosses and am never satisfied with status quo. Combine this with being remotely attractive and you draw out the nit picking, clock watching, jealous no-nothings strumming up drama. It is so tiring to truly work hard and have peers speculate or scrutinize because they simply lack the concentration on their own job. ( I am NOT saying this is you, I am assuming you have a valid complaint...just some thoughts)
I too have noticed co-workers who are late, even habitually and I can get mildly irritated too, it's human nature. But it's not my business if it doesn't affect my job and I'm not their boss. So I don't let it consume my day.
Certainly discuss it with your boss if it becomes "demoralizing" but remember that runs both ways. Nothing more demoralizing than working hard, doing well and staus quo peers assuming that naturally there's some favoritism going on.
rezume
of WA
@
Sep 09, 2009 00:27:48 AM
Not necessarily so. Outperforming and loyalty that begets jealousy, bitterness and lies
I worked very well with my boss as his personal assistant and he tended to rant about how well we worked together. That brought out the worst in the other women (and some men) in the office who had an idea in their heads that I had to be providing sexual favours to the boss. You would be surprised the level of staff that becomes involved in spreading rumours. This was even believed by the president of the company, which by the way is like a major endorsement.... Oh it must be true if he listened to it. I was so appauled that this lie could have obtained such merit. Careful what you say or if you must indulge in such behaviour, think first, very hard before you go around aiding in destroying someone's good character just because. I myself do not believe in spreading rumours. I have to see it with my own two eyes first. Of course most people don't share that view.
Lolo
@
Sep 08, 2009 15:59:03 PM
No Thanks
Just got out of a similar situation where the manager mainly hired and promoted people from her native country. Don't waste a lot of time there. Transfer or get another job if you can. Your work will be impacted by this favoritism.
movin_on
of NY
@
Jul 29, 2009 02:58:01 AM
Bosses Favorite?? may be his new girlfriend
Our boss has a tendency to date his favorites. The latest went all the way up the ladder of company management with no skills at all. We just sigh and wait for the inevitable split and firing. Sooner or later the girlfriend will no longer be in the picture. We have put up with this for 7+ years and it isn't going to change.
Gene Stevens
of NV
@
Jul 29, 2009 01:43:44 AM
incredible...
incredible...
Pronytymn
of AL
@
Jul 24, 2009 18:40:40 PM
The key question is always - Does this effect your job?
Thank you for writing this article and I'd also like to mention that this article has deeper meaning. How many of us have become the "difficult co-worker" because we were annoyed with someone else’s actions? To put it another way, how many of us may have jeopardized our own job because others people's actions annoyed us.
Alison's statement should be the deciding factor in how to handle a situation when some of us are annoyed by our co-worker's actions.
"But no matter the explanation, the answer for you is the same: Aside from being annoying, is this affecting your work? If not, you should stay out of it because it's really not your business."
Thanks Alison for writing such a great article!
Yours,
Kirsten Grant
Twitter ID: Kgrantcareers
Kirsten Grant
of IL
@
Jul 15, 2009 12:57:40 PM
I've been there...
Our boss has a favorite. In every meeting he calls attention to her, setting her above and beyond all of the other managers. He's given her the run of the entire company, regardless of the fact that she has less education and experience than other managers. She's his favorite. Period.
So, I thought I would tell him how it's perceived. I explained that it affects all of the managers when he doesn't hold her accountable for her shortcomings. When she doesn't meet deadlines, he makes excuses for her. The rest of us are told to meet the deadlines or be fired. It didn't go well. He was offended, of course, and then went to the employee and told her everything I said.
Because I told him how I felt (I didn't bring the other managers into it), I was bullied for the next 3 months. It was non-stop threats, yelling, and other abusive behavior. Since it isn't based on age, sex or religion there was nothing I could do. He has found a new target now, and I'm off his radar but I am looking for another job. I will never have equal treatment here, neither will any of the other managers.
C. Steele
of FL
@
Jul 14, 2009 08:27:37 AM
It never works !!
Hi Alison (I hope I can address you by your first name), I tend to disagree a bit with your views on co-employees who get SPECIAL treatment from the boss. I don't know about the nature of bosses in US MNCs. But having worked under quite a few US MNCs based in India, I do know that most of the co-employees who get special treatment are either the boss's favorite(Read girlfriends) or the relatives/ex-colleagues/friends of the boss. Well, I do agree with the fact that it is none of my business to see whether my boss is acting NICE with my co-employee or not. BUt the problem is that in 90% of the cases, my boss exempts my co-employee from work for obvious reasons and it is I who has to pay for her shoddy behavior. TO make matters worse, most of the bosses are not open-minded people, but rather jerks or people who belong to a very old school of thought. So my advice to affected employees is to act smart and do everything they can to avoid their boss dumping their co-employee's work on them.
Sam of WA @ Nov 14, 2009 21:43:27 PM
Jianing @ Sep 09, 2009 05:29:13 AM
rezume of WA @ Sep 09, 2009 00:27:48 AM
Lolo @ Sep 08, 2009 15:59:03 PM
movin_on of NY @ Jul 29, 2009 02:58:01 AM
Gene Stevens of NV @ Jul 29, 2009 01:43:44 AM
Pronytymn of AL @ Jul 24, 2009 18:40:40 PM
Kirsten Grant of IL @ Jul 15, 2009 12:57:40 PM
C. Steele of FL @ Jul 14, 2009 08:27:37 AM
Aswin @ Jul 08, 2009 15:42:31 PM
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