Radar magazine, the pinnacle of investigative journalism, placed an undercover call to Wesleyan University admissions officials recently and published the transcripts of a reporter acting as a representative for the Quiznos family (of sandwich fame). With the suggestion that the Quiznos heir was interested in enrolling, the journalist asked questions about low test scores, campus tours for agoraphobics, and the presence of competing cold-cut franchises on the premises. The ruse was an attempt to show how young people with flashy last names have a leg up in this world (duh).
The stunt is moderately funny, and there's nothing particularly damning in the Q&A—except maybe the admissions officer's apparent dismissal of dismal test scores and "shoplifting issues" (It's "a very holistic process" the Wesleyan official said). Also very reassuring is the information regarding private tours for high-profile candidates: "When Mr. Spielberg came to visit, I gave him the tour myself."
A Wesleyan spokesman told Inside Higher Ed that the person on the line did suspect something fishy but "didn't want to be rude"—which may explain the terse answer to the caller's most important question: "You don't have a Subway on campus, do you? " Wesleyan official: "No, we don't."