Should Your Kids Pay for College Themselves?

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Your statistics supporting parents paying for college are astounding, and seem compelling, if parents can do it. I'd like feedback on a series of posts I'm writing on parental responsibility to continue to pay if children choose majors that seems almost guaranteed to leave them unemployed--and when does the gravy train stop? [I start the 3-part series at "When College is A Means To No End: Financial Responsibility For a Murky Future" at http://wp.me/p22afJ-Kg. I both hope it adds to the dialogue, and would love feedback.] It's true, as you write, that the amount expected from parents is simply astounding. But, if parents CAN swing it financially, is fully supporting their children through school--and beyoond, as some do--really the best thing for our young adults? [This article here is linked in the second post. Thanks for enriching the dialogue.]

Candida Abrahamson of IL 10:19AM March 21, 2012

Your statistics supporting parents paying for college are astounding, and seem compelling, if parents can do it. I'd like feedback on a series of posts I'm writing on parental responsibility to continue to pay if children choose majors that seems almost guaranteed to leave them unemployed--and when does the gravy train stop? [I start the 3-part series at "When College is A Means To No End: Financial Responsibility For a Murky Future" at http://wp.me/p22afJ-Kg. I both hope it adds to the dialogue, and would love feedback.] It's true, as you write, that the amount expected from parents is simply astounding. But, if parents CAN swing it financially, is fully supporting their children through school--and beyoond, as some do--really the best thing for our young adults? [This article here is linked in the second post. Thanks for enriching the dialogue.]

Candida Abrahamson of IL 10:13AM March 21, 2012

I wonder how many students move straight from high school into college- and then graduate with a four-year liberal arts degree, with little notion of how they will translate that educsation into a career?
I believe we do a terrible job preparing our children early on (beginning in grade school?) to set goals later and train for a career. This is not to say that a third grader should be thinking about her life's work, but wouldn't be better if we began to provide more education in grade school about various careers and trades so that they are better prepared to choose relevent training and course work in high school?

Brian Wright of WA 11:06AM April 10, 2011

Or another solution would be that we need to more readily prepare students in high school to cut down on the prerequisites of things for college, that makes more sense than cutting 11th and 12th grade. Depending on how substantial material is for a certain major and how academically prepared a student is for their major is how students should receive funding. I don't believe it should be based on the parents. The parents should be responsible for room and board, that's basic care for your child, who would otherwise be living with you or living somewhere else incurring rent. Students should not be left trying to carry the burden of college tuition alone. I am one of those students. I get good grades, but this past spring I still had 10,000 dollars to pay and my parents cut me off. I had no way to pay for it and had to transfer to a community college. I now live at home and am not eligible for other government assistance besides a stafford loan. I have to pay with a stafford loan and make up the rest by working. I had to sacrifice my major of choice in lieu of one offered at the community college I am attending. I commute 40 minutes to school. While not all parents can be financially prepared for college, the students get shafted when their parents cut them off.

Anna of PA 9:16PM March 13, 2010

I paid for my own College and I am better off for it. I went to an affordable good state university and saved a ton of money rather then going to an over priced and over rated private school.
When the kids pay for College it gives them a vested interest in studying something that will lead to a meaningful career. If my parents had paid I would have studied medieval history, and guess what the job demand for that is?
Just my 2 cents worth.

Carl of TX 5:23PM January 09, 2010

What needs to be done is the 11th and 12th grade dropped and teens graduate high school at 16 like they do in the UK. Kids should be expected at that point to get job training or go to college for 2 years. The US government should be more than willing to pay for part of the education or job training. For the students who do well in 2 year colleges they should get serious breaks on the cost of a 4 year school. In 10 years this would change America from a welfare state that is losing jobs to an overseas market to one that could actually compete in the global economy.

Diana of VA 12:09AM January 06, 2010

As we all know ,colledge education is becoming more and more important in our life now ,especially in the area of finding jobs. However ,the cost is higher and higher and we have no idea of what to do.Maybe one's ability is more important than just a degree.But it is a fundamental.It is quite difficult to decide whether it is a must to go to college even with the aid of loans.What I want to say is that wo must think carefully about what we want and what is our target,only by which can all we done be worth enough.

f of FL 9:35AM December 25, 2009

I agree with paying for my kids college as long as they hold up their end of the bargain & not be a goofy party animal with bad grades wasting my money for nothing!!

allen kurtz of AZ 4:05PM December 21, 2009

... who has worked EXTREMELY hard in high school, has a perfect 4.0 GPA, high test scores, and all 5's on her AP exams.
As far as I'm concerned, she has earned my assistance in the very formidable task of paying for her education. My parents paid for me to go, and I made it through. The education I obtained has enabled me to support the household. Now it's my turn.
She'll just work part-time during the school year (so she can spend most of her energy on those tough honor classes), and get a job during the summer. We'll muddle through together.

Pamela of WA 3:05AM December 21, 2009

As college graduates, my husband and I fall into a unique and troublesome circumstance of thirty-somethings who will still be paying back their own college loans while trying to make everyday living expenses in a tough economy, yet still face the burden of how to help our children go to college in the future.
There is a real problem with relying on loans to pay for college in the first place. Acquiring a college degree has become not only desirable, but absolutely necessary to compete for jobs and living wages. The paradox is that however necessary it has become to get a degree, the price of higher education has gotten so astronomical that it is, in many cases, unattainable for many people. Without the aid of loans, many students will fall short on the money it takes. But students, as well as parents need mindful of what taking out loans really entails in the long-run. When you take out a college loan, you are mortgaging your future. You are promising to repay a debt in the future without knowing your future assets or income. You are banking on a promise, or a sometimes a hope, that you will graduate, that you will get the job you are wanting, and that you will have the funds to pay it back. This does not always happen. The job market may be tough, as it is now, you might have a health issue that prevents you from securing the future you had envisioned. Any number of life factors could impede on achieving that goal. This is not to say to scrap college, but to be more mindful of future consequences of having unmanageable debt.
It is difficult for a high school senior or college freshman to think out these possible financial outcomes at a time when they are just stepping out in the world. Parents, it may not necessarily be our duty to pay for our child's college education as much as it is to be a guide to our children so they may not get into a situation they can't understand or foresee. Instill our high schoolers with knowledge and life tools we may not have had, and perhaps bring back an old concept of, “if you can’t afford it, you don’t buy it.” I know for us, it will tough to push through the college expenses we have racked up. The best I can do for my children is to see that they do not fall into the same trap we did as students by spending too much on college.

Kathy Brunet of FL 3:17PM December 14, 2009